RULES OF LIFE
MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON
THIS ONE DECISION
WILL DETERMINE 90%
OF YOUR HAPPINESS
OR MISERY
WORK AT SOMETHING YOU ENJOY
AND THAT IS WORTHY OF YOUR
TIME AND TALENT
GIVE PEOPLE MORE THAN THEY EXPECT
AND DO IT CHEERFULLY
BECOME THE MOST POSITIVE
ENTHUSIASTIC PERSON YOU KNOW
BE FORGIVING OF YOURSELF AND OTHERS
BE GENOROUS
HAVE A GRATEFUL HEART
PERSISTANCE PERSISTENCE PERSISTENCE
DISCIPLINE YOURSELF TO SAVE MONEY
ON EVEN THE MOST MODEST SALARY
TREAT EVERYONE YOU MEET
LIKE YOU WANT TO BE TREATED
COMMIT YOURSELF
TO CONSTANT IMPROVEMENT
COMMIT YOURSELF TO QUAILITY
UNDERSTAND THAT HAPPINESS
IS NOT BASED ON POSSESSION
POWER OR PRESTIGE
BUT ON RELATIONSHIPS
WITH PEOPLE YOU LOVE AND RESPECT
BE LOYAL
BE A SELF STARTER
BE DECISIVE EVEN IF IT MEANS
YOULLL SOMETIMES BE WRONG
STOP BLAMING OTHERS
TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
FOR EVERY AREA OF YOUR LIFE
BE BOLD AND COURAGEOUS
WHEN YOU LOOK BACK ON YOUR LIFE
YOULL REGRET THE THINGS YOU DIDNT DO
MORE THAN THE THINGS YOU DID
TAKE GOOD CARE OF THOSE YOU LOVE
DONT DO ANYTHING THAT WOULDNT
MAKE YOUR MUM PROUD
cherie carter-scott's rules of life
(Carter Scott references this quotation:) "Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood." (Helen Keller)
Rule One - You will receive a body. Whether you love it or hate it, it's yours for life, so accept it. What counts is what's inside.
Rule Two - You will be presented with lessons. Life is a constant learning experience, which every day provides opportunities for you to learn more. These lessons specific to you, and learning them 'is the key to discovering and fulfilling the meaning and relevance of your own life'.
Rule Three - There are no mistakes, only lessons. Your development towards wisdom is a process of experimentation, trial and error, so it's inevitable things will not always go to plan or turn out how you'd want. Compassion is the remedy for harsh judgement - of ourselves and others. Forgiveness is not only divine - it's also 'the act of erasing an emotional debt'. Behaving ethically, with integrity, and with humour - especially the ability to laugh at yourself and your own mishaps - are central to the perspective that 'mistakes' are simply lessons we must learn.
Rule Four - The lesson is repeated until learned. Lessons repeat until learned. What manifest as problems and challenges, irritations and frustrations are more lessons - they will repeat until you see them as such and learn from them. Your own awareness and your ability to change are requisites of executing this rule. Also fundamental is the acceptance that you are not a victim of fate or circumstance - 'causality' must be acknowledged; that is to say: things happen to you because of how you are and what you do. To blame anyone or anything else for your misfortunes is an escape and a denial; you yourself are responsible for you, and what happens to you. Patience is required - change doesn't happen overnight, so give change time to happen.
Rule Five - Learning does not end. While you are alive there are always lessons to be learned. Surrender to the 'rhythm of life', don't struggle against it. Commit to the process of constant learning and change - be humble enough to always acknowledge your own weaknesses, and be flexible enough to adapt from what you may be accustomed to, because rigidity will deny you the freedom of new possibilities.
Rule Six - "There" is no better than "here". The other side of the hill may be greener than your own, but being there is not the key to endless happiness. Be grateful for and enjoy what you have, and where you are on your journey. Appreciate the abundance of what's good in your life, rather than measure and amass things that do not actually lead to happiness. Living in the present helps you attain peace.
Rule Seven - Others are only mirrors of you. You love or hate something about another person according to what you love or hate about yourself. Be tolerant; accept others as they are, and strive for clarity of self-awareness; strive to truly understand and have an objective perception of your own self, your thoughts and feelings. Negative experiences are opportunities to heal the wounds that you carry. Support others, and by doing so you support yourself. Where you are unable to support others it is a sign that you are not adequately attending to your own needs.
Rule Eight - What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. Take responsibility for yourself. Learn to let go when you cannot change things. Don't get angry about things - bitter memories clutter your mind. Courage resides in all of us - use it when you need to do what's right for you. We all possess a strong natural power and adventurous spirit, which you should draw on to embrace what lies ahead.
Rule Nine - Your answers lie inside of you. Trust your instincts and your innermost feelings, whether you hear them as a little voice or a flash of inspiration. Listen to feelings as well as sounds. Look, listen, and trust. Draw on your natural inspiration.
Rule Ten - You will forget all this at birth. We are all born with all of these capabilities - our early experiences lead us into a physical world, away from our spiritual selves, so that we become doubtful, cynical and lacking belief and confidence. The ten Rules are not commandments, they are universal truths that apply to us all. When you lose your way, call upon them. Have faith in the strength of your spirit. Aspire to be wise - wisdom the ultimate path of your life, and it knows no limits other than those you impose on yourself.
Richard Templars Rules for Life
1 Keep it under your hat
2 Youll get older but not necessarily wiser
3 Accept what is done is done
4 Accept yourself
5 Know what counts and what doesnt
6 Dedicate your life to something
7 Be flexible in your thinking
8 Take an interest in the outside world
9 Be on the side of the angels, not the beasts
10 Only dead fish swim with the stream
11 Be the last to raise your voice
12 Be your own advisor
13 No Fear, No Surprise, No Hesitation, No Doubt
14 I wish Id done that and I will
15 Count to ten or recite Baa baa black sheep
16 Change what you can change, let go of the rest
17 Aim to be the very best at everything you do no second best
18 Dont be afraid to dream
19 Dont dwell on the past
20 Dont live in the future
21 Get on with life its whooshing
22 Dress like today is important
23 Have a belief system
24 Have a little space for yourself each day
25 Have a plan
26 Have a sense of humour
27 Choose how you make your bed
28 Be in this world, but not of this world
29 Get used to stepping outside your comfort zone
30 Learn to ask questions
31 Have dignity
32 Its OK to feel big emotions
33 Keep the faith
34 Know how to switch off
35 Know where true happiness comes from
36 Know when to let go when to walk away
37 Look after yourself
38 Maintain good manners in all things
39 Prune your stuff frequently
40 Remember to touch base
41 Draw the lines around yourself
42 Shop for quality, not price
43 Its OK to worry, or to know how not to
44 Stay young
45 The American solution doesnt always work
46 Think for yourself
47 You are not in charge
48 Have something in your life that takes you out of yourself
49 Only the good feel guilty
50 If you cant say anything nice, shut up
51 Accept the differences, embrace what you have in common
52 Allow your partner the space to be themselves
53 Be nice
54 You want to do what?
55 Be the first to say sorry
56 Go that extra step in trying to please them
57 Always have someone or something that is pleased to see you...
58 Know when to listen and when to act
59 Have a passion for your life together
60 Make sure your love making is making love
61 Keep talking
62 Respect privacy
63 Check you both have the same shared goals
64 Treat your partner better than your best friend
65 Contentment is a high aim
66 You dont both have to have the same rules
67 If you are going to be a friend, be a good friend
68 Never be too busy for loved ones
69 Let your kids mess up for themselves - they dont need any help from you
70 Have a little respect and forgiveness for your parents
71 Give your kids a break
72 Never lend money unless you are prepared to write it off
73 There are no bad children
74 Be up around people you love
75 Give your kids responsibilities
76 Your children need to fall out with you to leave home
77 Your kid will have friends you dont like
78 Your role as a child
79 Your role as a parent
80 Were all closer than you think
81 It doesnt hurt to forgive
82 It doesnt hurt to be helpful
83 Take pride in what we do collectively
84 Do your job well
85 Hang out with smart people
86 Be generous with your time and information
87 Get involved
88 Keep the moral high ground
89 Have a plan for your career
90 Learn to see your community as part of a bigger picture
91 Look at the long term ramifications of what you do for a living
92 Be good at your job
93 Be aware of the damage you are doing
94 Be for the glory, not the degradation
95 Be part of the solution, not the problem
96 Check what history would say about you
97 Keep your eyes open at all times
98 Not everything can be green
99 Put something back
100 Find a new rule every day or occasionally at least
30 Happiness Tips: Program Your Life for Optimum Enjoyment
Written: 9/04/2007
For
many of us, the goal of life isn't ultimate wealth, a massive amount of
stuff, or the perfect car. It's happiness, plain and simple.
Some
people may be created happier than others, with enjoyment of life
programmed into their hardwiring. For others, getting to happiness
isn't always that simple. You weren't programmed that way.
But
like any programming, yours can be changed. Rewrite your life program
to include as many of the following tips as appeal to you, and the
ultimate goal of happiness can be yours. If you've already achieved
complete happiness, well done!
- Experiment to find out what makes you happy.
Different things make different people happy. If you aren't sure what
your hot spots are, experiment. Try different things out. Find out what
you enjoy most. The answers just might surprise you. Try a few of the
following for starters.
- Surround yourself with others who are happy.
If you are around angry, depressed or sad people, it will transfer to
you. You can't help it. But if you're around people who are happy, that
will also transfer to you. You'll also learn their habits, and learn to
react the way they do when something bad happens. Slowly weed out the
negative influences on your life and replace them with positive ones.
- Count your blessings.
When something bad happens to you, try not to focus on it. Instead,
take a minute to count your blessings. Everyone has good things in
their lives, whether it is health or loved ones or whatever.
- Gratitude sessions.
Along those lines, it is a good practice to have a daily gratitude
session. Think about what you have to be thankful for, and silently
thank those who have done something good for you in some way. If you
have time, take the time to call them or email them to thank them.
- Think solutions.
Instead of thinking about problems, move to the next step: how to solve
it. When someone says to me, "Oh, this is so hard," or "Oh, I can't
seem to do this," or "Man, we don't have any more of that," I just ask
them, "Well, what's the solution?" If you develop solution-oriented
thinking, you'll be much happier.
- Connect with others.
As much as possible, spend time with those you love, and with others
who you enjoy. It could be a simple phone call, or a short visit. Or
take a day with the person or people you'd like to spend time with.
Have a conversation, do things together, be intimate.
- Accept things.
We are often unaware of it, but we usually want things or people or
ourselves to change. And that's a sure way to lead to unhappiness,
because we cannot control the world. We have to accept things as they
are, try to understand them, even love them. Including and most
especially ourselves: accept who you are, allow yourself to be
yourself, try to understand and love yourself. Then do the same with
the others in your life.
- Take time to savor life.
Instead of rushing from one thing to another, resolve to have less to
do each day, less appointments and fewer tasks. Then do each thing
slowly, with mindfulness and ease, and try to be present in the moment.
And truly enjoy whatever it is you do, from talking to eating to
walking to just sitting.
- Notice small things.
Along the same lines, try to notice when you feel good, or you're not
suffering, or you are tasting something really delicious, or you feel
something cold or hot, anything. Noticing the little things will help
keep you focused on the present.
- Treat yourself.
Take a few minutes each day to give yourself a little treat, whether
that's something like chocolate or berries, or a bubble bath, or
walking barefoot in the grass, or taking a nap. Whatever it is, treat
yourself. You deserve it.
- This shall pass.
When bad things happen, and you're having trouble accepting it, think
to yourself the same thing the ancients did: "This, too, shall pass."
And it will. And you'll survive.
- Volunteer.
When you give to others, whether that's money or the stuff you no
longer need or your time and love, you become happier. It's true. Take
5 minutes today to call a charity and volunteer to donate some time
sometime this month. It will make a big difference in your life.
- Follow your passions.
If you do what you love to do, especially for a living, you wil be
extremely happy. This is one of the best things you can do. If it seems
impossible, don't give up. Others have done it and you can too.
- Look at your achievements.
Instead of looking at what you haven't done, or what you've failed at,
think about what you have done. Many times that's much more than we
realize.
- Laugh.
Just the simple act of laughing can make you happier. Watch a funny
movie, tell jokes, read a book by Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett, go
to humor sites on the Internet. And laugh your head off.
- Realize that you deserve it.
You deserve happiness. That simple statement is actually profound for
many people, as they don't believe they really deserve to be happy.
It's often unconscious. If you feel that within yourself, you need to
first realize that you deserve happiness. Repeat it if necessary.
- Get into the flow.
There is a state of doing known as Flow, which is when you completely
lose yourself in a task and forget about the world around you. It leads
to happiness, and productivity. Set yourself up for it by clearing
distractions, giving yourself a challenging (but accomplishable) task,
and making it something that you like doing. Then try to lose yourself
in that task.
- Have a goal.
Too many goals will lead to ineffectiveness. Try to choose one goal and
really focus on it. And work to accomplish it. Goals lead to happiness,
if you make progress on them.
- Get inspired.
Take time to read blogs or books or magazine articles about success
stories related to what you want to do. It will get you energized.
- Celebrate.
When you do something right, when you accomplish something, when you
feel like it, reward yourself. Celebrate. Have fun, and pat yourself on
the back.
- Autonomy.
Try to have at least one area in your life where you have autonomy.
It's best if this is at work, but if not, find another place, such as a
hobby or civic activity. You need to be in control of what you do to be
happy.
- Spend time doing something you love.
Make room in your life by eliminating some of the commitments you don't
really like doing, and replacing them with something you truly love.
- Show little acts of kindness. Each day, try to be kind to others in little ways, opening doors, smiling, giving up your place in line.
- Exercise. Just a short walk or run could lift your spirits and reduce stress. Nothing difficult. Just get outside and move.
- Catch negative thoughts. Monitor your thoughts. When you catch negative ones, try to think of something good instead. Corny, but it helps.
- Jealousy doesn't help.
Many people obsess about others who are successful or happy. That gets
you nowhere, fast. Instead, be happy for them. Then focus on yourself,
and what you do right.
- Stop watching and reading news.
Sure, this sounds like a head-in-the-sand suggestion. But really, if
you give this a try, you won't miss a thing. And instead, you can focus
on reading books and listening to music that lifts you up.
- Learn something new.
It's strange how many of us are afraid to try new things, or admit we
don't know something. But learning new skills or new information is one
of the most fun things there is to do. Give it a try.
- Check out nature.
Go and watch a sunrise or sunset. Watch the water, whether that's a
river or ocean or lake. Watch the stars, or the clouds. Watch animals.
Watch people. Watch children. And be inspired by it all.
- Laugh some more.
When you are in the middle of a bad situation, look around you, realize
the absurdity of the situation, and just laugh. In a year, no one will
care. In two years, you'll be laughing at this anyway. So laugh now,
and be happy now.
Written for Dumb Little Man by Leo Babuata
